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How I got my ass handed to me by this new proudct launch

Alright, so I've been dreaming about launching this product for years, but honestly, I was terrified. You don't just wing something this important; it has to truly make lives better—it's serious shit.

Whether you're juggling work, managing solo, or wrangling three kids and a dog, this product needs to work for you. So, I sat my ass down for three intense weeks, channelling my inner genius. I emerged feeling like Sasha Jobbs, ready for the grand reveal...

And then, reality slapped me hard. Mum called it 'meh,' auntie said it didn't feel like Cheeky Zebra, and I'm pretty sure my Nani used the word 'ugly.' That night, I found solace in a kebab.

Everyone agreed it was functional as hell, but it had the personality of a wet lettuce. It was giving Theresa May. I'd forgotten the key ingredient: You don't come to us just for functionality. You come for FUN, SASS, and JOY.

This range needed to not just work—it needed to dazzle. It had to be your cheerleader, and make you want to be your best self without getting you fired! So back to the drawing board, I went. Another 10 weeks of trial and error, but guys, we've FINALLY NAILED IT! Even Auntie was impressed!

I've been using it for the last two weeks, and honestly, I'm blown away by how much it's improved my life. I can’t f*cking wait to share it with you on Friday!


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